/feels/ - personal experiences

Maybe what i am describing is a normal humane condition. However for some reason my psyche interprets this functioning as something that does not work right. Internally i live in an idealistic world, with beautiful aesthetics. Let's say my "inner" vision, the one my imagination and abstract thinking creates is always "paraphrasing" the world around it. It takes the saturation and changes it, it views the physical plain from different angles that satisfy my hunger for cinematographic aesthetics. It speaks fables to itself about true love and the most altruistic and humanistic ideals, filled with perfection (perfect for me at least) and poetic reasoning. In contrast the other world is filled with real-life objective (as objective as something can be) reasoning. Cold, calculating, dragged and slammed in the pavement. Every response is as rational as it can be. The aesthetics change they are monochromatic or blueish in a sense, it's the world i have to live most of my life in. The problem is no that the latter world exists, cause i feel that i would embrace such thinking. The problem is the dichotomy itself is so strong that i cannot pick a side to advocate, I have seen a lot of people being either in one of the two sides, expressing themselves through only ONE of these sides. But for me i switch from glasses to glasses. The inner one i can only express and merge it with the outer one only when i write (short stories or poems). However feeling that i always have to switch mindses and to keep some short of invisible balance within me, no being able to chose a side makes me feel alienated. Even by people that express the inner world of mine.
What to do you think? have you ever experienced it ?