arisuchan    [ tech / cult / art ]   [ λ / Δ ]   [ psy ]   [ ru ]   [ random ]   [ meta ]   [ all ]    info / stickers     temporarily disabledtemporarily disabled

/feels/ - personal experiences

share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
Name
Email
Subject
Comment

formatting options

File
Password (For file deletion.)

Help me fix this shit. https://legacy.arisuchan.jp/q/res/2703.html#2703

Kalyx ######


File: 1494965150028.png (262.99 KB, 445x417, p3j.png)

 No.166

need to vent, sorry

dad treats mom and sis like soykaf, but we have a good relationship
how do I confront this situation? seems kinda weird to lose it and enter in a über-autistic rage mode when both parties start to yell at each other
although I agree with mom and sis to an extent, it's very difficult to simply pick a side when I have no beef with anybody
this situation is turning me into a hikki, too, I hardly leave my room and talk to other people, everytime I have to go out I have to deal with this and it got me cornered

 No.169

>>166
Since there is a question, I will answer.
You don't.
It's not your fight, not your business.
People argue, they have different points, and see the other side's grievances differently than they see their own. Third parties are just choosing either on subjective merit, virtue signaling their bullsoykaf and making a mess out of it. If it doesn't threaten ending with something irreversible, say, a divorce, don't feel like you are expected to take sides in not-your-feud.
Whatever it is all about, you will see things differently in a couple of years.

I would invest myself in family issues that did not start out as my business, throw in my own emotional business and grievances into it, and the way it ended up, it was all anti-father meme. The situation was fucked up and my involvement fucked it up further. In retrospect, I see nothing beneficial or just about it, and I wish I would have just tried to stay objective, instead; even completely withdrawn would have been better. I needed time and a different perspective to even have the capacity to understand it fully.
The only good thing about it is that no one died along the way, so it all worked out in the end. Things got scarred, though.

 No.170

Just sit back, grab some popcorn, and watch the family circus.

 No.171

Be the cool mediator man. You'll eventually blow up if you don't.

 No.172

File: 1495028375307.jpg (47.08 KB, 563x609, że_co_kurwa.jpg)

>>166
OP, don't get involved, if you want to do something encourage them to stand up to him. DO NOT CONFRONT HIM.

Confronting him will just destroy what you have, and if you are worried about becoming a hikki, this wont help. Encourage them, dont fight for them.

Ultimately Families are a soykaf storm, get out of there, you'll be much happier.

 No.173

>>169
>you don't
that's pretty terrible advice, honestly. a third party should try to help by absorbing emotions. not even just to help the family; letting a situation like this build is definitely going to come back and hurt OP (or is already).

don't start side-taking, though, unless a side starts trying to manipulate or physically abuse.

 No.176

>that's pretty terrible advice
It could be, or it could not be. We don't have enough information.
Obviously, OP does not blindly obey anything anyone writes in a thread. I'm just advising modesty and calm in action. Less of a 'I'm pissed off → one time confrontation/outburst → everyone claps', more of a systemic, long-term approach.
It is unlikely that involvement by an emotionally swayed party will end up beneficial.

>letting a situation like this build is definitely going to come back and hurt OP

Not necessarily.

>honestly. a third party should try to help by absorbing emotions

Mediation could be helpful, but it could be harmful both to the one attempting the mediation if he gets too absorbed, and to the situation itself - it would not be an impartial mediator, but a strongly emotionally invested person.

 No.177

>>172
>Ultimately Families are a soykaf storm, get out of there, you'll be much happier.
This so much, I don't get why people have families when it's just… something very foul.

 No.178

>>177
God willing, I'll graduate in a year and never talk to mine again. My real family is my friends (and lain w)



[Return] [Go to top] [ Catalog ] [Post a Reply]
Delete Post [ ]